CHAPTER 1

“It’s All About Me, Me, Me!”

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People with this thinking error tend to emphasize their total difference from and superiority to other people.  They see themselves as special, even “one of a kind.”  They use others to achieve their own ends. They are unable or unwilling to identify with or acknowledge other people’s feelings. They simply cannot (or will not) relate to others’ needs and desires. What they want or need is the thing that is most important in their own eyes, so they usually behave in a selfish and uncaring manner.

People with this thinking error are actually narcissists.  The term originated from the Greek mythology, where the young Narcissus fell in love with his own image reflected in a pool of water. Typical narcissists exhibit a pattern of traits and behaviors which signify infatuation and obsession with one’s self to the exclusion of all others and the egotistic and ruthless pursuit of one’s gratification, dominance and ambition.

“It’s all about me” people are unlikely to generate close, warm, loving relationships. They are impatient, anxious or angry much the time.  This has often been seen to result in abusive and dysfunctional relationships, loneliness, temper tantrums and provoking behavior leading to violence and domestic violence and murder, pornography and sexual fantasy addiction, alcohol and drug addiction, adultery, bankruptcy, divorce, child abuse, nervous breakdown and despair.

People who live under the “it’s all about me” misconception will exaggerate their own achievements and talents to the point of lying. They see themselves as more competent than everyone else, and may attempt to assume a leadership position because of this - even though they do not yet have very many achievements under their own belt.  

People with this thinking error are falling right in line with Satan’s plan.  He wants us to put ourselves first and others last.  He loves to see us get “big heads” with inflated egos, and take for ourselves the glory that actually belongs to God. Just remember, but for the grace of God, we would be nothing. Any skills, talents and abilities we have were given to us by God and are to be used to glorify God, not ourselves. We have been put on earth to serve others, not ourselves.

1 Read Jeremiah 9:23-24. 
  a) About what things would a carnal man be likely to boast? (vs. 23)
   
   
   
  b) If we’re going to brag, what does the Lord say we should brag about? (vs. 24)
   

2. 2 Corinthians 10:17-18 is a direct quotation from Jeremiah 9:24. Here Paul was rebuking the Corinthian Christians who were bragging about him being the founder of their church.  Paul said he could never boast about what he had accomplished in Corinth, since it was God who was at work through him.
  a) His only boast, therefore, could be ... (vs. 17)
   
  b) In the end, who is it that is approved? (vs. 18)
   

3. The only proper glorying for the believer is in God.  It is God’s commendation, not one’s own or any other person’s, that matters.
  a) Herod Agrippa I, called Agrippa, is a good example in the Bible of a man who thought it was all about him. When he was forced to take sides in the struggle between Judaism and the new Christian sect, he didn’t hesitate a second, but assumed the role of its bitter persecutor. He killed James the apostle with the sword, and harried the church whenever possible (Acts 12).
    What did the people do in Acts 12:21-22 that was so offensive to God?
   
    How did Herod, puffed up with pride and vanity, respond to their flattery? (vs. 23)
   
    What action did God take? (vs. 23)
   
  b) Read Daniel 4:28-33. What infamous words, spoken by Nebuchadnezzar, brought about his downfall?
   
    What happened to Nebuchadnezzar because he thought it was all about him?
   
   
   
   
    Read on through the end of Daniel 4.  Did Nebuchadnezzar ever break free from his madness? 
   
    Explain what happened next in his life.
   

4. Read Matthew 20:16.  We may think it’s all about us, and that we deserve to be the first one in line for whatever blessings God has to give out.  But In this verse, Jesus said
 
  This underscores the essence of God's grace, and the fact that He rewards and blesses man according to His will and pleasure, not necessarily according to what we think we deserve.

5. Much of this thinking error is rooted in pride.  What does God say about pride?
 
 
  c) (Philippians 2:3)
  d) (Proverbs 16:19)

6. What advice would you give a person operating under the “It’s All About Me” thinking
error?
 

Continue to Chapter 2

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